Thursday, 10 December 2009

I hate the bargaining side of depression

Not the 'Five Stages of Grief' bargaining, the 'If I can just make it through today' bargaining. The one where you promise yourself that if you can make it through this day in one piece, you can have a whisky, or you can enjoy the release of Friday, or you can have that piece of turkey you have waiting for you in the freezer.

On the surface, it works. It gives you something to think about, and set your mind on, as you fail your way through a singing lesson, and as you lounge languid and bored in each of your lectures. But really it doesn't. Because lurking deep below the surface is the real and destroying knowledge that no matter how successfully the day goes, there's not going to be anyone at home to kiss you 'Hello', to cuddle you and to tell you how proud of you they are for making it through each day.

And even worse, there's the knowledge that surely there will be a day when you can't make it through. And the implications of that are crushing.

Tuesday, 17 November 2009

I have awesome friends.

Monday, 26 October 2009


For the last few days I've been listening to the newest version of Tom Milsom's Indigo on repeat.

Today this arrived in my sub box.

Play it loud.

Wednesday, 21 October 2009

Uni or Your Memory

(See what I did there? Ahohoho!)

So*! Much to be said!

Well firstly, I am, as you will surely notice, writing this not from a decrepit Dell with a missing 'O' key (the sudden abundance of said letter is clearly a give-a-woy), but from my brand new shiny MacBook Pro, which means I can now Dailybooth, do the occasional video (links will come once I actually get bloody around to it), and generally just enjoy e-life that little bit more.

The biggest thing to happen between my last blog and this one was that I went to go see The Mountain Goats. Followed shortly by the fact that oh god I totally moved to London and started university.

Uni's great, the course is boring at the moment, but promises to pick up and I'm making friends pretty quickly and easily. My academic advisor looks like a cross between Hagrid and Meatloaf, but acts like Dr. Cox, which is pretty legendary (can you tell I love him?), and he seems to like me, which is cool. But really, and I'm not gonna lie, it's all about having my own toilet.

The Mountain Goats on the other hand (or 'Goat' as should be as it was only John Darnielle (I say 'only' - I mean, it's fucking JOHN DARNIELLE! I was in the same room as him and everything!)) were nothing short of perfect. I was originally going to go with my friend Casey, but she unfortunately developed a pretty severe allergic reaction to some guinea pigs (it's true! Ask her!), so I went with the wonderful Jess instead. We've met before at a Patrick Wolf show earlier this
year, but by the nature of such a gig we didn't get to hang much. So it was pretty awesome to be able spend a bit of time chatting before and after the gig this time.

Being that he was touring his new album, I expected John to play a whole load of songs from it, and maybe a couple past singles. Brilliantly, though, he admitted that he doesn't come over to the UK too much, and so played a whole load of old classics, like 'Jenny' and songs from the last few albums, like 'Broom People', 'Up the Wolves', and 'Woke Up New'. He did play some new stuff; 'Matthew 25:21', and 'Deuteronomy 2:10' both got an outing, as did 'Ezekiel 7 and the Permanent Efficacy of Grace' for which I love him even more.

Overall, it was by far one of the best gigs I've been to. Darnielle is an AMAZING performer, whose banter is sometimes so good you don't actually want him to play. And of course a lot of a gig's brilliance is about who you go with, and I was lucky to be with Jess, who was great fun, and didn't seem to judge my giddy excitement at each song announcement too much. So yeah! Awesome night!

And Finally** this coming November will be a busy one for me. As well as growing a moustache, doing graduation ceremonies and working on my 'Writing about Music' assignment (which I'm doing on The Decemberists), I will be doing 'Hometaping' - the NaNoWriMo of music. Basically I have 30 days to write and record an album at least 20 minutes long and upload it to share with the world. It's a nice slant on the novel writing idea that's gaining popularity each year, and I'd love it if y'all joined me! Let me know!

Also I've really been getting into the work of the HP Alliance and everything they've been doing to reduce WorldSuck and make the world a nicer place. One such thing is Wrock4Equality which had tonnes of Harry Potter fans calling people up and urging them to overturn Prop 1, the Prop 8-like legislation that threatens to overturn the equality laws passed in Maine this year. So check it out, even if you're not into Harry Potter. Love is something we can all spread, regardless of whether our inspiration be Dumbledore, Jesus, or fucking Bono.

Speak soon!


*I start so many of these with 'So', it's almost becoming a tradition. I'll stop now, I promise.
Also: Earliest footnote ever? Ithinkso!

**I call this 'And Finally' because, in my head, it's always full of funny 'round-up' stories, though it's generally anything but. I'll try and get a water-skiing squirrel story for you next month if you're good, though.

Sunday, 13 September 2009

Relative escapism

So as many of you will know, I've spent most of my teenage years hating the house, county, and basically everything about the place I live in. I've been dreaming of getting out, running away and leaving for the city since I was old enough to go on trains by myself.

In just under four days, this dream will come true. I'll leave Dorset, pack up my posessions, and move into a university-owned flat in London, ready for my first year at Kingston. And yet, I honestly, truly, really don't want to.

When I first started dreaming of London, in my mind I'd turn up to a friend's house with a small bag, some clothes, a guitar and a bottle of Jack Daniel's. Over time, this dream changed, Jack Daniel's became Scotch, the guitar became first a ukulele, then an accordion, and the clothes got progressively weirder. In short, I built my dream and concept of London around who I wanted to be.

Where this became a problem is when that dream became tangible. By the beginning of this summer, it was definite. Come September, I would definitely be moving in to my own* place with a decent laptop, a host of instruments (including an accordion) in tow, and feeling pretty damn good about myself.

But it was not to be. Instead, I'm arriving on Thursday, already broke, laptop-less, accordion-less, with no smart clothes that fit me any more after the splurgiest of summer splurges, a mullet (courtesy of the well-trained folks at Toni & Guy), and a broken tambourine.

Having had my wildest dreams presented to me on a silver platter, the idea of coming back down to earth, and arriving at uni the same formless, style-less, wannabe kleptomaniac musician I've struggled most of my life to not be is depressing beyond measure, and my determination to not have to experience it is reaching the dizzying heights whereupon I'm finally ready to admit that I fucking miss the easy escape afforded by drugs.**

One of these days I'm going to wriggle up on dry land.


*Okay, so maybe not 'my own', but shh.
**I'm truly sorry if this sentence makes no sense. I got bored around 'and a broken tambourine' and I fucked off to go get drunk.

Tuesday, 8 September 2009

Why Me and Tumblr will never be BFFs.

After ranting about it so passionately in yesterday's post, I then spent the evening pruning, editing, and generally molesting my Tumblr, and I came across my big issue with it. It lacks interactivity.

Most people opposed to Twitter criticise it because it appears, on the surface, to be simply another way to inform the world of your every thought, [bowel] movement, and irritation, no matter how inane they may be. Unfortunately, many times, they are right. A quick glance at most of the accounts participating in the daily rape of the trending topics show nothing more than: "Goin out." "Out wit m8s" "Back from bein out wit m8s!! LUV YA GIRLIES!" with almost no replies to anyone (except maybe to point out the fucking obvious to someone so as to maintain that air of quiet satisfaction such people always seem to carry around with them, the twats), on their pages.

Happily though, a lot of users do interact, even if it's just to promote their business, and the site is better for it. Such interactions may indeed start with an inane 'breakfast' tweet (as the world at large seems to believe Twitter is solely made of) but will, as I recently experienced, rapidly move on to other topics, and both parties can be enriched or at least mildly entertained by the whole thing.

Tumblr, however, seems to have briefly considered this idea with it's 'Tumblarity', but thrown it out of the window. The closest possibility I've yet to find of interaction is a Facebook-like 'Like'* option, and then the 'Reblog' facility. Even if I am just being thick** the whole site appears to be based around the concept of 'Look at this. It's pretty damn sweet/cool/philosophical/4-Channically brilliant, why don't you try it out for yourself?'.

Which, don't get me wrong, I'm all in favour of. I just find myself waiting for comments (like I do on here. Refresh. Tweet. Refresh. Cry. Repeat.) whenever I post something of my own making (like this John Green/Exzibit macro I was so unrighteously proud of) and then throwing a little paddy when I can't comment on someone else's inspired post/reblog without reblogging it myself.

Anyway, in matters of the (almost) non-nerd, as well as the last in a series of lovely and delightful postcards and letters I've had from the always fabulous Jess Young, whose photography you should totally check out, I got my copy of Driftless Pony Club's 'Expert' today in the post.

There was a debate posted by Alex Day some time ago, on the DFTBA Records blog, about the packaging their CDs came in. At the time I'd only bought 'Taking Leave' by Alan Lastufka and Tom Milson, which came in a sort of hybrid between a full jewel case and a slip case.*** As Taking Leave was an EP, like Expert, I was expecting a similar casing for the DPC EP. It came, however, in a slip case (it was signed by WheezyWaiter, which made it all okay) which I must admit being a bit disappointed in. A slip case may be much kinder to my cramped CD rack, but I do miss the fullness of a jewel case or hybrids.

The musical content is what really matters, and it's brilliant, everything I wanted from the band, and endlessly repeatable. I just can't help feeling let down by the packaging. It feels like a freebie, and I half feel like I might as well have just bought it from iTunes.

Anyway, I'm out bitchez.


* Convoluted solely for the opportunity of a legitimate 'double like'. They're worth millions.
**And please tell me if I am, it's a common occurence
*** There probably is an actual name for it. It'll always be 'The Hybrid' to me, though.

Monday, 31 August 2009

On Arrogance, Macs and Tumblr

Well aware of how tedious it is for me to start every update with an apology, this time, I shall do no such thing. In fact, in a unbelievable streak of arrogance, I'm not only going to blame you personally for the lack of updates here, but I'm also going to post-date this entry to August. I've a rather beautiful streak of at least one post a month going at the moment, and I'm not about to let that go to seed simply because you couldn't be bothered to check here sooner.

It's okay, I forgive you. Just don't let it happen again.

So, I guess the big news is that I'm off to university, and moving to London! I have an address, a new bag, and a host of reading material all ready and (almost) packed, and, with any luck, this will be last update I post on this laptop. I'm moving to pastures whiter, and I'm getting a Mac at last.

That last statement will have made one third of you cheer, one third of you despair, and the other third wonder when I became such a nerd, wonder why you're reading this shit anyway and move on. The fact of the matter is that I've had it with PC's, and if me and Windows don't go on a break soon, I'm afraid we might have an irreparable falling out. As Becky 'YourTikken' Smith said on her WordPress:
I don’t dislike Windows. I used nothing BUT Windows up until last December. It’s just that, well, Apple products are so much easier. They cater to my simple mind. Everything is sleek and the keyboard shortcuts make sense and my Notebook takes about 30 seconds to start up, tops. It’s true: Apple is an all-pervasive, Orwellian, violating force – but my GOD does it feel good to get violated by them.
I've made my choice, you can fight it out in the comments.

In other news, some of you may recall that I ended my last post with a prediction that I would, before long, add a Tumblr account to the list of sites that I'll never use. Well, I did. I'm not all together sure that I'll stick around on there; as BillTvMacon said in one of his recent videos, Tumblr seems to be every site I already use all rolled into one. All they've added is 'Tumblarity' which just seems to be a rather heartless measure of how much you fail at using their site. And I fail a lot.

The problem is that Tumblr seems to be mainly suited to people that have a lot of varied media to share with the world. I don't take many photos (I always mean to, but forget, or my camera is out of battery), I rarely search for photos of my favourite bands unless I want a desktop background, I don't audioblog, I don't film videos, and aside from the occasional quote and a blog post on here, I haven't much text to share with the world that isn't linkable on Twitter. The end result of which is that I just end up parroting other people's posts, and, as most of the people that follow me on Tumblr already know each other, this seems a bit silly. Plus, the layout confuses me.

But regardless of my foreseen length of stay, you should all go and follow me anyway - It will make me childishly happy.

That's it for now. I might well write more this week, my Dad is on a writing course and I want to (as ever) prove that I'm better than him. I also have the house to myself, and as everyone that has been to my house will attest, writing is about all there is to do here.

Hope you're all well!


Saturday, 18 July 2009

A link-tastic penance in blog form.

So it's been a good while since I did anything remotely bloggy. I apologise profusely and hand you this humble offering as penance for my non-journalistic laziness.

I recently bought 'Taking Leave', a joint-effort EP by Alan Lastufka and Tom Milson. It's only £6.00 including delivery to us UK-ers, which, considering the sheer beauty of the lyrics and the genius of the music, is really a bargin. It's available from the DFTBA Records website (or from iTunes or Amazon in MP3 form), where you can also buy some other gems from the YouTube community, including an album of songs based on Doctor Who!

Here's a rather tasty preview of Alan and Tom's work:

One thing that is definitely well overdue a blogging is my trip with the ever fabulous and lovely Louise to see Counting Crows* in Bournemouth. They were scheduled to play in December with Ben Folds, but due to vocal problems the gig was pushed back to May. It was an absolutely amazing gig, definitely one of the best I've ever been to in terms of showmanship alone. Adam Duritz, the lead singer, has more showmanship in his little finger than the likes of Lady GaGa have in their entire mirror-plated bodies. For realz. He makes standing still and singing loudly on tiptoes utterly, mind-bendingly enthralling, so you can imagine how squeal-worthy his inclusion of 'With a little help from my friends' into one of their songs was. A five star gig.

The three of you that also follow my other blog, Project Read 2009, will have noticed that it has fallen into disarray. This is not to say that my reading challenge has also gone down the same path, in fact, if anything, it's gone from strength to strength since I stopped blogging about it every three days.** I am currently taking part in Infinte Summer, a challenge to read the 1079 page*** Infinite Jest, by David Foster Wallace, over the course of the summer. It's hard-going, but incredibly well worth it; Wallace is an author the likes of which it's rare to come by these days. So come join us: We have bookmarks!

That's it for now, I think. I am, as ever, on Twitter, as well as on Facebook, 43 Things, and soon, I fear, Tumblr.

Best Wishes!
(Dumbledore Forgot to be Alive)


P.S: Have a Wish List.

The Office: Season 3, Episode 23 (Beach Games)
Looking for Alaska: Finished
Perks of Being a Wallflower: Finished
An Abundance of Katherines: Finished
Infinite Jest: Page 221

*My 'O' key doesn't work properly sometimes: Guess the typo.
**An overstatement of gigantic proportions
*** Plus footnotes. Lots of them. Some of them 11 pages long.

Wednesday, 15 July 2009

Music from a Tree!

Sheer creative brilliance!

Diego Stocco - Music From A Tree from Diego Stocco on Vimeo.

More on it here.

Sunday, 28 June 2009

Oh Lord..

You know there's not a part of this email that doesn't scare me to the depths of my very soul?
My dear. how are you doing today hope fine. my name is Confidence. i just came acros your profile today at nerdfighters. on my search for relationship. To me age. distance. race and color do not matter. rather what i value most is the understanding and love that will exist between us. So in a specially manner i will like to further communication with you so as for us to know each other well. if you share the same view with me you can get back to me.
yours in love Confidence.
Her full name, apparently, is Confidence Doe.

Aside from the fact that whoever sent this has obviously done a good bit of stalking, as it came to an address I don't use for the Ning, instead to one I've mentioned in passing to a friend once, what scares me the most about this, is the line:
'..the understanding and love that will exist between us.'
Apparently, I have no choice in the matter!

Yet another reason, methinks, to stay away from the Ning.


Wednesday, 24 June 2009

Obligatory Updates!

So that last post referenced a load of fairly big things that have happened in my life that I have yet to tell you lot about, and it felt shoddy just tacking them on at the end, there, so instead you get two updates in one afternoon! You lucky lot, you!

So firstly. I'm now going to University in September, to Kingston to read Music. I briefly outlined the situation in the last post, but basically I thought that when I didn't reply to them at the beginning of last year's term, that they'd have given my place away like they threatened. Then I forgot that I'd applied for this next year at all, as I got caught up in the Goldsmiths broohaha. I recently got a letter from them asking me to sort accomodation (which I did) and telling me they were looking forward to seeing me in September.
So after a lot of deliberation, I decided to go, partially fearful that were I not to, I'd never actually get into university at all. I did however, also speak to various people about Goldsmiths, and about the course at Kingston, and I feel sure that I'd do much better at Kingston than I would at Goldsmiths, where even on the audition day, I felt somewhat dwarfed in terms of talent.

Other news includes me getting an organ (£20 from the local village hall - 'Tis broke but easily fixed), the purchase of my very first John Green book (Looking for Alaska), alongside The Perks of Being a Wallflower and the first three seasons of The Office (see below), and my goals for the one week I have off.

Basically, in a rash moment of motivation, I decided to have five songs up on my MySpace (at least two of which must be GBM orginals), both this and my Project Read blog updated and sorted out, a podcast out, and a busking licence, by this next coming Sunday. As yet, I have one cover of Beirut's 'The Penalty' up on MySpace, and two half edited blog rants on here.

Evidently, I have lots of work to do!

Anyways, I am off to my piano lesson, and in the true spirit of v/b-loggers all over the world - I'll edit this when I get back.


The Office: Season 2, Episode 11
Looking for Alaska: Page 119
Perks of Being a Wallflower: Unstarted
Infinite Jest: Not yet purchased.

How do you do this, again?

So as you may well have noticed, I've not properly blogged since BEDA. In fact, truth be told, I've not done a whole lot anywhere voluntarily since BEDA. I've worked a bit, I've gotten into uni, and I've obtained an organ, but I had only a modicum of free will in any of those activities.

This, no doubt, is going to lead to problems in future. I rarely do anything voluntarily unless I have people chasing me up about, unless I feel like I'm definitely achieving something, and unless there is a definite and tangible sense of failure if I don't complete it. Here lies the problem.

Because as I mentioned earlier, I've recently gotten into university (actually that's a lie, I got into university a year ago, I just thought I no longer had a place and forgot I applied for a deferred entry). Kingston University, to be specific, to study music. After that, as many of you know, I want to go on to become a musician and writer.

Already, I hope, you can see the problems. Firstly we have university, where as everyone tells you, it's 'down to you'. I had serious issues (like handing in my coursework to my teacher just as he was about to post them all off to the exam board) at school, where it wasn't down to me, it was down to a team of teachers all of whom were hired to get the best, or at the very least some, work out of me. This attempt, it is widely believed throughout both my family and my school reports, was a complete failure. Even when I had teachers sitting in my room next to me to make sure I worked, I still managed to avoid doing anything constructive. I will actually go completely out of my way to avoid work.

So far, not so good.

Then after that, we have 'the big wide world'. Looking at the list of conditions under which I will work, you might feel I am best suited for a career in an office somewhere. Where I've got a manager hassling me and the other members of my team to get sales, or to crunch those figures, and where the tangible sense of failure comes from being fired for not working hard enough.
But no! I have instead decided to choose a career in music and writing, where until you reach a stage where you're controlled by labels and publishing houses, all pressuring you to finish your album or book, you're on your own. No one pushing you apart from your under-nourished family, and no one but your own sense of shame to tell you when you've failed.

I am, as they say, completely fucked.

Until of course, you realise that you're reading this, and so, some how, I have at least attempted to achieve some of my goals. Despite the distraction of losing my inspirational can of Coke (long story, don't ask), I've still managed to get back onto the blogging bandwagon. This, I guess, is what keeps musicians playing and writers writing. Rock bottom.
Not that I'm anywhere near it at the moment. I am doing fairly well for money (so much so that I'm actually lending it to my parents now..), I've a well planned-out future, and 7 discs of The Office left to watch. You could argue that life is dandy.

I guess it is, as it usually is, a mixture of fear and hope that keeps us (me, at least) going. Fear that I will hit Rock Bottom, with all the strings on my bow old, torn and tattered, and Hope that by uploading an if-I'm-honest-pretty-shit Beirut cover onto my MySpace will in some small way,kickstart my dreams of playing it to a baying crowd of thousands.

So really, God only knows how this is going to go. I might well stumble my way through uni, try music and end up writing for a small-time music website that's struggling to stay alive by the week, or I might well eventually get motivated, start working, and in five years time be telling this story to a smiling mob of teens before launching into 'The Ballad of Bone-Idle Baggott'.

I'll keep you posted.


Saturday, 30 May 2009

A long, long time ago..

So I stole this off of Valerie ages ago, and never posted it. I feel I should post it now rather than let it simply clutter up my Drafts folder. I'll post date it, to make things easier.

1. First thing you wash in the shower?
I just tend to stand there for a while..

2. What color is your favorite hoodie?
I've joined the 'I wear my girlfriend's hoodie crew'. It's black, huge, and lovely.

3. Do you plan outfits?
Not really. I don't have a huge number of clothes, so any planning would often be made redundant by something being in the wash.

4. How are you feeling RIGHT now?
Sneezy, and a bit worried. You?

5. What’s the closest thing to you that's red?
A drum kit, I guess. There's a red splotch on my coffee cup, though.

6. Tell me about the last dream you remember having?
I was playing a gig in a pub, and I did 'Into the Sunshine' by Julia Nunes, but I didn't know it. I was really underprepared and it was horrible. Then I went outside in the snow and my friend got hit by a truck. - Bad times.

7. Did you meet anybody new today?
Not yet, but I hope to.

8. What are you craving right now?
A cigarette, if I'm honest (coffee always makes me want them), and a bit of normalcy/more money.

9. Do you floss?
When I remember to/when we have the cool little floss bows that we sometimes get.

10. What comes to mind when I say cabbage?
10 points if you know why.

11. Are you emotional?
I like to think that I'm emotionless, but I'm sure everyone I know would disagree.

12. Have you ever counted to 1,000?
No, but my cousin has.

13. Do you bite into your ice cream or just lick it?
This sounds like such a dirty question. Nine times out of ten I bite.

14. Do you like your hair?
Yeah, it's okay. Gonna get it cut soon, but it's at that nice stage where it's manageable enought to style, but long enough to not have to if I don't want to.

15. Do you like yourself?
No. I like how I write, I like how I often know what to say and how I'm good at somethings, but no. I don't like myself, and I don't see why anyone does or should, for that matter.

16. Would you go out to eat with George W.Bush?
As long as it wasn't a Republican do, I probably would, yeah.

17. Would you throw potatoes at him?
Only if he started it.

18. What are you listening to right now?
Dr. Noise doing a very good Cure cover.

19. Are your parents strict?
In some ways they're ridiculously uptight, but they're really lax about the cool stuff like, sex, drink, and visiting random places.

20. Would you go sky diving?
I'm with Valerie on this one. I wouldn't, simply because I can get my ya-yas in so many other, less-possible-death-inducing ways, that jumping out of a plane just seems idiotic. (I can for example get my ya-yas from Ikea. They cost less but you have to assemble them yourself -10 more points if you get the reference).

21. Do you like cottage cheese?
Yes. It's yummy and I could eat it all day long.

22. Have you ever met a celebrity?
I met Jimmy Carr in Poole one day (random, I know!), Bear Grylls (who's an utter knob on Tv, but quite nice in real life, well, to 10 year old, reverential Castle Court schoolboys, anyway..) and I've had Twonversations with one or two on Twitter.

23. Do you rent movies often?
Not really. My parents do, and I borrow them when they're done.
I am going to today, though. Wall-E ><

24. Is there anything sparkly in the room you're in?
Just my outlook on life.

25. How many countries have you visited?
4/5 France, Germany, Italy, and Portugal (and Ireland, if you count it - I was three and threw up lots). I've driven through lots on the way to and from Italy, though.

28. Have you made a prank phone call?
I have once or twice, but I tend to suck at them.

27. Ever been on a train?
Yeah, it's pretty much how I get anywhere, ever.

28. Brown or white eggs?
Again, I'm with Valerie. Brown eggs perturb me. Unless of course this question is a metaphor for something higher, in which case I don't judge on the basis of colour.

29.Do you have a cell-phone?
I do. I hate it, but unfortunately it happens to be very reliable.

30. Do you use chap stick?
No. I do use Vaseline, though - Lube?

31. Do you own a gun?
My Dad has an Air Rifle, which from time to time, I take out, set up cans in the garden and use. But not too often, it makes me feel too up-state New Yorkian.

32. Can you use chop sticks?
Yes, I can. I learnt while watching Michael Palin.

33. Who are you going to be with tonight?
Louise and her Dad, I believe! :D

34. Are you too forgiving?
I'm not usually the one doing the forgiving.

35. Ever been in love?
Yes. It rulez.

36. What is(are) your best friend(s) doing tomorrow?
I think some sort of party, but I'm not sure.

37. Ever have cream puffs?
No, and I don't know what they are, and I'm not sure I want to.

38. Last time you cried?
Well I didn't cry, but Season 3 One Tree Hill makes me weepy every other episode.

39. What was the last question you asked?
"What if he's just found out he's President of the World?"

40. Favorite time of the year?
Bah. In Winter I say Summer, in Summer I say Winter. In Autumn I say Autumn and in Spring I say "Achoo!".

41. Do you have any tattoos?
No. I've been planning one since I've been about 13, and in that time, almost every single friend I know has gotten one.

42. Are you sarcastic?
I try to be, but it often doesn't work out. My Dad does really get sarcasm, and my Mom just gets upset.

43. Have you ever seen The Butterfly Effect?

44. Ever walked into a wall?
Not by accident.

45. Favorite color?

46. Have you ever slapped someone?
Yes, and I instantly regretted it both times.

47. Is your hair curly?
Yes, and it annoys me.

48. What was the last CD you bought?
I don't actually know. I'm such a bad person.. I just steal them from RapidShare.

49. Do looks matter?
They do, but they shouldn't.

50. Could you ever forgive a cheater?
Depends entirely on the situation. You'll never know what you'll do until you love someone and you're in that situation.

51. Is your phone bill sky high?
Nope. Free calls to all UK landlines, bitches!

52. Do you like your life right now?
Not reaaally, but I don't think I ever really do. I have lots of nice things and nice people, though! :]

53. Do you sleep with the T.V. on?
I can fall asleep with it on, but I never let myself.

54. Can you handle the truth?
I'm not sure I can handle anything, but I'd rather know the truth, if that's what you're asking.

55. Do you have good vision?
Yes, but it gives me headaches.

56. Do you hate or dislike more than 3 people?
Probably. I do try and imagine people complexly, and I think/hope I'm a more balanced person because of it. However, there are times when one does need to hate.

57. How often do you talk on the phone?
I dunno. Not often..

58. How do you feel about holding hands?
I am definately in the pro-hand-holding party.

59. What are you wearing?
The aforementioned 'Amy's hoodie', jeans, and my skate shoes.

60.What is your favorite animal?
Dormice. <33>

61. Where was your default picture taken? Right here.

62. Can you hula hoop?
I have been known to.

63. Do you have a job?
Sort of. I work in a hospital, but they rarely call me in, so I'm technically unemployed.

64. What was the most recent thing you bought?
Pills, credit, and alcohol.

65. Have you ever crawled through a window?
Yes. I lock myself out with startling regularity.

Well that was fun.


Tuesday, 26 May 2009

Movie Tiime!

So yeah, I'm aware that I haven't blogged in a criminally long time, and there's a good reason for this. I've been writing songs instead. Which, I hope you'll agree, is better for both of us in the long time. I also don't have a laptop at the moment, as mine showed its true worth and disintergrated worse than if Boba Fett got his hands on it *Nerd Jokes! Nerd Jokes!*

I do however have some things to say, so expect something real soon.

In the mean time, here is a list of all the films I own, for the epic Twitter/Skype FilmFest that is happening soon.

8 Mile
10 Things I Hate About You
40 Year-Old Virgin
101 Dalmations (Live Action version)
A Cut Above
A Knight's Tale
A Series of Unfortunate Events (So should be under 'U', but whatever, Excel!)
About a Boy (Great book, great film.)
Alfie (Both Old and New versions)
Alice in Wonderland
American Pie 1, 2 & 3
Anchorman (I love Lamp.)
As Good as It Gets
Atonement (Crap book - Hated it! Great film, though)
Austin Powers 1 & 3
Bedknobs and Broomsticks
Big Daddy
Black Beauty
The Brothers Grimm
Bruce Almighty ("Smite me, oh mighty smiter!")
Bugsy Malone
Charlie's Angels (It was free with a PS2, don't judge!)
Chitty Chitty, Bang Bang
The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian
Cruel Intentions
Das Leben der Anderen (If you like films about the GDR, you'll love this!)
Donnie Darko ("Sometimes I doubt your commitment to Sparkle Motion!")
Dude, Where's My Car?
Dumb and Dumber
Eastern Promises
Edward Scissorhands ("Edward and Edwina Spoonhands..")
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
Everything is Illuminated (Has Eugene Hutz from Gogol Bordello)
Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas
Fight Club
Finding Neverland
The Fox and the Hound
For a Few Dollars More
The Fountain
Gangs of New York
Garden State (Great film, with an awesome sountrack!)
George of the Jungle
Get Rich or Die Tryin'
The Golden Compass
Goodbye Lenin! (Another GDR film xD)
Green Mile
Gremlins 1 & 2
Harry Potter (All apart from Order of the Phoenix)
High Society
Hot Fuzz
Ice Age 1 & 2
Indiana Jones 1, 2 & 3
Jackass: The Movie
Jungle Book (The Vultures! <33)
Lady and the Tramp
The Last Kiss
The Libertine
Lion King 1 & 2
Lord of the Rings (Complete set)
Love Actually
Mamma Mia! (Shh, now! xD)
Master and Commander
Matrix 1 & 2
Miss Congeniality (Oh very dear..)
Monsters, Inc.
Monty Python: Life of Brian and Meaning of Life
Moulin Rouge
Mr. Bean: The Movie
The Mummy
Muppet Christmas Carol ("Oh, here comes Mr. Humbug!)
Naked Gun
Nanny McFee
Ned Kelly
The Nightmare Before Christmas
Of Mice and Men
Oliver and Co.
Peter Pan
Pete's Dragon
The Pied Piper of Hutzovina
Pirate's of the Carribean: The Curse of the Black Pearl
The Polar Express
Practical Magic
Pulp Fiction
Pursuit of Happyness (So sad!)
Rescuers: Down Under
Road Trip
Robin Hood
Rock 'n' Rolla
Romeo + Juliet
The Secret of NIMH
Scary Movie 3
Scenes of a Sexual Nature
Schindler's List
School of Rock
Shrek 1 & 2
Sin City
Silence of the Lambs
Snow White
Song of the South (That's what Uncle Remus said)
Star Wars (All but The Revenge of the Sith)
Starter for 10
Sword in the Stone
Talladega Nights
Team America
The Truman Show
Titan A.E
White Christmas
Without A Paddle

Judge me in comments.


Thursday, 30 April 2009

BEDA the Last: Lookin' Back!

Hello, my lovers!

God, this is sad, isn't it? I'm genuinely tearing up. I had planned something epic, for this last post. #BEDA the Musical, maybe? It needs to happen!

The truth is, though, that like a lot of my fellow bloggers, I've run out of things to write about. If this were a Tv series, this would be the obligatory compilation episode, complete with a slow-mo montage, Barry Manilow, and italic writing. I could use screen shots and PowerPoint, but I just can't be bothered. It's hardly epic, and I only have half an hour.

Instead, I will link and discuss my three favourite moments, my three favourite blog posts by other people, and then summarise my #BEDA experience in a Scrubs/One Tree Hill kind of style.

There was the 'Oh My Eagle' post, where I predicted the rise of speed-paedophilia, and apparently pledged my support to all perverts. I'm not often fond of my writing or my futile attempts at humour, but I am a little proud of this post.

There was the time I almost failed! Oh, how we laughed! (Imagine this segment in the aforementioned montage stylee - it'll make it just a little less arrogant..) All credit must go to Casey for helping me not fail..

And there was the time when I went mad on UrbanDictionary. This is another one of those rare moments when I actually enjoyed reading back what I'd written, and was also when I started using asterisks!*

So that's that bit done, now the less egotistical segment!

I really enjoy dozzzier's style of writing. It's witty, informative, and is really a pleasure to read. At times, it reads like a professional journalist, particularly her account of the #amazonfail business, which I linked to in my post about it. This post is probably my favourite, though. I love how it just shows a mundane, uneventful day, and really brings it to life!

I know I said that I wouldn't link anymore posts from my blog but this one wasn't by me. It was by my girlfriend, Amy, who was my first guest blogger, and I really do think it's brilliant. I know I'm terribly biased, but I think that considering she'd not even heard of blogging before she found herself lumbered with me, she took to it so naturally (of course, being super nice to me always helps! :P). I'd love to see more!

One of the people whose blogs I was introduced to by #BEDA (when I will stop using the hashtag, God only knows..) was Valerie's. And it's actually the first post I read of hers that I'm linking to now. All of her posts are brilliant, but this one just stood out for the sheer poetry of it (a poetry that I ruined with an idiotic comment). Enjoy.

Well that's it from me and #BEDA. I'll miss it, I really will. It gave me such a wonderful chance to feel part of a huge blogging community as well as showing me blogs I probably wouldn't have ever seen, and bringing me closer to some of the many people I speak to online each day.

In a speech straight out of the Oscars, I'd like to thank everyone that has read my inane updates each day, both of my guest bloggers, and everyone who has commented, rated, linked, and given me ideas. You are all amazing.

Thank you, and goodnight!


*Made you look! (Did you think I wouldn't?)

Wednesday, 29 April 2009

BEDA the Twenty-Ninth: Attachment Issues


I have fifty minutes, and because of last nights idiocy, so much to tell you!

Firstly, let us deal with the title. Attachment issues - I has them. My job at the hospital, for any of you that don't know, involves taking food and drink to the patients and their families. I basically do the job of a waiter (and a bus-boy, dish-washer, sou chef, and medical orderly - it's actually really fun!), but in a hospital. Because some patients are there for a while, it's pretty natural for you to build up a little rapport with them, and to look forward to taking some of their orders.

Over the last couple of shifts I did, I built up a relationship with one of the elderly ladies there, who had spent her life savings to come in, to have a series of operations on various ailments. She was really so lovely, and wonderfully eccentric, and I quickly became her favourite, and I really used to enjoy going in to take her odd orders.

Anyway, after my little breakdown last night, my Mom pulled some strings with my boss (my Mom works there too, how'd you think I got the job?! I'm trained for nothing!), and got me tomorrow off, and although I'm really very relieved, I really will miss that quirky lady. I've given my Mom instructions to make sure she pays her close attention, and to make sure she gets her marmalade sandwiches at 3:00!

Also, on the attachment issues, front, I'm having real problems coping with the end of #BEDA. I know (I'm hoping, anyway) that the readers and friendships that I've gained as a result of it will stay, but I'm really going to miss it. It feels more like a conversation that it does a series of unrelated posts, and I'll miss the feeling of community that it gave me. 

I've decided I'm gonna post more regularly; I'm aiming for at least twice weekly updates, and I'm considering celebrating the mistake the FHM 2009 calendar (it was a present.. :P) made this year, and blog on Friday the 31st April as well.

This brings me to my next point. Inspired partly by a promise I made to Amy recently, I've decided to start (or at least make one and get so freaked out by the sound of my voice that I bury my mic and give it up for good) recording a podcast. 
Now, I say 'podcast', it wouldn't be one, as such. It would really be more of a recorded and extended version of this blog, uploaded onto something like RapidShare,  free for you lot to download if you fancy.

I understand that this is quite an arrogant decision. Surely my blog is enough, without having to clog up the internet with my semi-coherent mumblings.. Well firstly, I have very good diction, thank you very much, and secondly, well fuck it. Why not? There is something about spoken word that a written blog can never convey (accents, stresses, inflections for instance). I'd love to start up a comedy show like VLR, or something like DFTBA Radio, and if I could find someone to do it with, I get straight onto it (any offers, btw - Let me know!). But I'd still go ahead with this anyway. 

I would like to know your opinion, though. I'm not that self-assured. Lemme know in comments.

Love and ham sandwiches!*


*Mustard optional; Available on White or Wholemeal bread.

Also, Jack Conte is brilliant. Love him.

Tuesday, 28 April 2009

BEDA the Twenty-Eighth: Suprise Work Sucks Ass

Gooday, Sunshine!

So today really sucked.

It started off with my Dad waking me up, to tell me that I'm working today and tomorrow. Apparently the hospital is hideously busy, and horrendously understaffed, so yours truly was dragged in to help out. So the initial yayness of work (and therefore monies) was almost immediately outweighed by the potential of a sucky day.

But still, you'll remember me saying that I really enjoyed work last time, so I made my way in, cautiously optimistic, and to a degree, I was right to be. There was a new face working there, Alistair, who's just about a year older than me, and me and him got on well, and for a busy day, the work panned out nice and evenly without any big rushes. However, I was still shattered from the lack of sleep (I fell asleep at about 5:00am last night), and by about 3:00pm, with two hours to go, I wanted to go home.

Overall, it was tiring, boring, but okay. But then I realised that I was going to have to do the same thing tomorrow, and the day after, when I had so much planned for this week, and I began to flag. This, partnered with a severe lack of food, lack of sympathy from every that's ever worked ever, and a lack of anything on iPlayer to cheer me up, and I don't want to wake up tomorrow, let alone go work with the dying.

So you'll forgive me if this post is shit.

I need a hug.. Big time.


(Disclaimer: I'm not claiming to have the market cornered as far as LifeSuck goes, or as far as shitty days go. I know that some people are going through far worse than this right now, and my heart goes right out to them. You should totally give them hugs first. I'm just feeling really low, and I can't be assed to fake a smile for this thing tonight. Sorry..) 

EDIT: So I'm feeling better, now. One of my biggest faults is that I have a tendancy to overthink things, and crippling self-confidence. Hence, one of the most depressing blog posts since I started this thing.. But I just read a little post that made me realise that things will get better, and then I made chocolate ReadyBrek, hot chocolate, and started watching Friends.

As long as I breathe deep, and think shallow, I think I'm good!


Monday, 27 April 2009

BEDA the Twenty-Seventh:
Imagining People Complexly is Hard!

Hello Beard Racers!

Get the joke? Do you? Well congratulations on having read at least two of my blogs!

So recently I've been reading some of Alex Days older diaryland entries. (One of these days I will post a blog where I don't mention either him or John Green, and it's going to be epic.) They're all very personal, intimate, and at times, quite emotional, so I wasn't all together comfortable reading them at first. He has, however, recently said that he intends to publish them as a book in the future, so I'm feeling better about my apparent intrusion into his life.

He first started posting when he was 14, so understandably, they're quite embarrassing to read, especially after I realised that just under a year later I would follow in his exact footsteps. We both went through a phase of following the pagan religion Wicca, we both made close friends online, and we both overused smilies and the use of asterix to denote *activity*.

It's really quite an odd experience, though. I'm used to mature, intelligent, and informed adult Alex that we see in his videos and wherever else he [used to] post on the internet (especially as I only quite recently joined the Nermie Army). Now all of a sudden I'm seeing a side of him that I hadn't even begun to imagine, and it's very hard to not see the two as completely different people.
It's partly because he's obviously undergone quite a large change in the last six years, which is to be expected. It's puberty, we all do. However, he is still the same person, so I can only conclude that it's down to my failure to see Alex as anything more than the persona he presents us with.

Whilst I'm not shifting the blame away from me here, I think that this may really be the fault of the internet. Think about it. Just think of three people you only know on the internet, or if you don't have that many people you only know online, just imagine how you saw your friend the last time you chatted on MSN or Skype. I may well be wrong, but I'm guessing you can only construct an image of their personality from how they interact with you. (Feel free to pwn me in the comments if not, btw)

I guess it's just a problem inherent to both our natural settings, and the barrier that the internet creates between you and everyone else, and is something that can only really be changed by a conscious effort to remind ourselves that the idiot in the BlogTv waiting room complaining about how John won't respond to him, is as human and real as you are*.

Apologies if you have no idea who or what I'm talking about here.. Less esoteric blog posts resume again tomorrow, I promise.

Love you all!


*For the record, I'm not pretending this is my own original thinking at all. I fully credit that I have just taken the concepts provided by John Green and the DFW speech and applied them to the internet. Again, feel free to tell me to STFU in comments.

Sunday, 26 April 2009

BEDA the Twenty-Sixth: Meme Time and Dr. Horrible

Hi everybody!

It's your favourite time of the month! Meme time! (Not to be confused with Mean Time - A period necessary in every loving relationship.*) However, in the words of Yogi Bear: This ain't just your average internet meme, Booboo!

This time it's the meme king Alex Day that's behind the wheel, and it's not just another 'Five Facts and tag' game. It's called 'The Cube', and before you read any further, I need you to watch this video here (or just skip this bit and move on to the all-singing, all-dancing bit further down).

Seen it? Interesting, huh? I imagined a black cube, about 50 by 50cm, but it was a computer-type thing (like the one in the Terry Prachett novel Truckers, if you've read it). It was just sitting there, in the cracked dry desert. The ladder was completely vertical, and right in the background, and the horse was just standing around near the box, but in much the same position in the background as the ladder. I couldn't really place the flower anywhere properly, but it was in the foreground. The storm was in full throw, but there was no rain or lightening coming down. It was just loitering overhead.

To be honest, I'm not all that sure how much faith I place in it. I guess it makes sense in some ways, I have little confidence in myself, but I do think I'm quite intelligent. I do like to keep things separate like it suggests, and I try not to let the rain dampen my spirits. But as many of my friends will attest, I lean on my friends for everything, and my girlfriend is everything to me. So unless sub-consciously I'm a complete loner (and at this point I think we're trying to make the questions fit the answer) I'm not completely taken in by the whole thing.**
Still, it's an interesting psychological experiment, and I'd be very interested to read the accompanying book.

The second part of today's post is dedicated to something I'd heard of before, but never experienced it fully until today. 
I'd heard covers, such as Bill's, Hank's and Lauren's, and I was roughly aware of what it was, and so today I decided to take the plunge. It said on the Wikipedia page, that it was available on Hulu, for people in all countries.

It lied. Thankfully, however, a very nice user named KarikiNeroli has it uploaded on their YouTube account, so I watched it on there, and I can honestly say, I've never seen a musical quite as brilliant. I'm not going to compare it to Rent, or Les Mis, because it's obviously not in the same league (it's about 45 minutes long and is the brainchild of Buffy/Firefly creator Joss Whedon), but it was hilarious, with amazing, catchy, and well-sung songs, and it just did not disappoint, from start to finish.

I know a lot of you reading this will have seen it already, but those that haven't, you should.

Anyways, that's it from me today. I have the rest of this next week planned out. It's a little ironic that I've been wondering what to write about for most of the month, and now I have so much to pack into so little time!

Hope you're all well, and had a fabulous weekend.


*Not to be confused with Greenwich Mean Time, which is apparently some sort of localised period of frugality.
**Having said all this I just went through it with a friend and we found several plausible answers for all the odd parts. I'm still not fully convinced, however, so what I said still stands.

Saturday, 25 April 2009

BEDA the Twenty-Fifth: Excuses, Excuses

Bonjour, mes amis.

I do often wish that I had an opening line. Like zefrank's 'Good Morning Sports Racers!', or WheezyWaiter's 'Hey there, Beardlovers!'. I know that giving a collective name to all twelve of the people that follow this would be a bit pretentious, and to be honest, I doubt this is ever going to have more than 15 followers (yes, I am confident that three more will come!), so there's little point when I can address you all by name.

I guess I should really ask for your forgiveness. Last post, I said that more would come on the topic, and indeed more shall come. But not just yet. As well as the follow up post(s) to that, I have another quite ambitious blessay, which is in the process of being written, both of which I'd like to have up by the end of #BEDA.

Combine that with over-ambitious writing projects to my girlfriend (1 year and 3 months today, Happy Anniversary, baby! (Yes we are one of those couples that counts the months, if you knew me, you'd understand why! :P)), and I'm sure you can understand why these will all take a little longer than I'd hoped.

In other news, I'm starting to think quite seriously about getting into writing. I still don't think I'm really good enough, but I enjoy it, so why not? It's not going to be instead of music, I don't think, unless it takes off/is profitable (which from what I've heard, it really isn't), but it'll give me something to do in the meantime. So I've sent of some examples of my writing to a couple places, and am planning a project to try and highlight certain aspects of it, for an upcoming project by the BBC.

Sorry for the lack of anything real for a while, I hope to get on that by Monday.

Love to you all!


Friday, 24 April 2009

BEDA the Twenty-Fourth: Time that is Intolerant


So I'm aware that I must go at least one week without referencing John Green as some sort of demi-God, but the fact of the matter is that the man has bloody brilliant taste in poetry. Especially when you log on to Twitter at 5:00 in the morning as you're falling asleep, see he's live, rush over to BlogTv and the first thing you note is that his cathartic voice is gently wafting the words of W. H Auden towards your welcoming ears.

He brought to my [our] attention a deleted part of the poem 'In Memory of WB Yeats', which I hadn't heard before.

"Time that is intolerant
Of the brave and the innocent,
And indifferent in a week
To a beautiful physique,

Worships language and forgives
Everyone by whom it lives;
Pardons cowardice, conceit,
Lays its honours at their feet.

Time that with this strange excuse
Pardoned Kipling and his views,
And will pardon Paul Claudel,
Pardons him for writing well."

It amazes me that I've learnt more about myself as a person and about English and how brilliant writing can be from watching the vlogbrothers videos and the live shows, than I ever learnt at school.
Suck it, Clayesmore.

This is a short, pointless blog today, but one which I plan to expand on.

Watch this space.


Thursday, 23 April 2009

#BEDA the Twenty-Third: Defining Giles


I've noticed that set titles for my #BEDA blogs are slowly changing. Apparently I'm now making them hashtags. Fun times! I'll go back and edit them in May, to keep my OCD happy.

Speaking of changes, you'll (hopefully) notice the ones around here! I've gone for a nice new white look, I've finally gotten rid of the pretentious mind-wank that was lurking under the title (replacing it instead with a pretentious quote about writing), and I've added a 'Skype Me!' button to make it easier for youse to stalk me. I like it, but it's by no means finished, or indeed set like this! Lemme know in comments what you think.

So JohnnyDurham has just kicked off a fabulous new meme (no sarcasm, I actually like this one), where you look your name up on UrbanDictionary [Side note - I used to be an editor for UrbanDictionary; I'd come home from school each day and they'd have emailed me a whole bunch of definitions to sift through and moderate.. I was a nerd from a very young age]. My name, Giles, is quite an unusual one, albeit one that every Buffy fan should know..

And indeed:

1. Giles - Buffy the Vampire Slayer's watcher.

Some things never change. The fact that I'm English (with a posh accent to boot), drink tea, and alarm easily does nothing to make this any less funny.

2. Giles - The kind of person who loves you:
'Awwwwwwww, Giles! You're such a Giles, let's make out!'

I promise you I'm not making this up, nor did I write it. It is good PR, though, it must be said. I shall now direct all future love interest* to this page..

Although, maybe not:

3. Giles - A beer-swilling, foul-mouthed Irishman who is known for his excellent leadership abilities.
'Damn! Giles can fucking drink!'

There is a small, albeit unlikely, chance that this was written about me. I do, for reasons unknown, put on a (bad) Irish accent when I'm inebriated. It is true that my leadership skills are second to none, and that, being a man of some heft, I can drink my own weight, and then some.** However, I doubt it. As anyone that's ever seen me drunk will verify, I rarely drink beer, choosing either whisky or wine, and when I do choose beer, I tend to spill as opposed to 'swill'. I also become overly verbose (moreso than normal), and scarily effeminate.

So perhaps not.

There are other definitions, but these are the best. I think we can all agree we've had a jolly good chuckle about them all! Now I'm not sure how Johnny's meme is going to go, and whether I should tag anyone. I will anyway, as this sort of thing is all very new and exciting to me.

I tag Amy, Casey, Weezie, Lydia, and Valerie.

Happy defining!


*I am of course joking. I'm all about the Amydouken! <33
**Two of the three facts in this sentence are lies.

Wednesday, 22 April 2009

#BEDA the Twenty-Second:
These titles are getting silly

Hey gorgeous!

Okay, so this going to be quick (that's what she said, ha!). I literally couldn't think about what to write, more than usual. This might be because I woke up about 10 minutes before I left for my piano lesson, in which I played lots of lovely blues, and then I came back here and watched Alex Day on BlogTv. So yeah, not a whole lot to write about.

I'm actually getting better at piano, though, which is made of yay! I can almost play with both hands, and my improvisations getting there too. This makes me sound like such an amateur. I can play piano, just not boogie-woogie, and well, not very well at all, if I'm honest. But shh.

I'm re-considering learning to drive. I have previously said that I'll never learn to drive unless it's really getting in the way of things. At the moment, I can get a bus pretty much right to Amy's house, and there's a main line train station that runs past my doorstop that'll take me all the way to London if I let it. So no problems so far.

But today I was being driven by my Dad back from my lesson and we were driving past a really nice bit of countryside, and I just really regretted that I'd never just be alone, driving to nowhere with Zach Condon tingling my senses as I take in the vista. And then learning to drive just seemed to make sense. I am still very severely dyspraxic though, I can't tell my left from my right (for serious, I really can't), and I have terrible co-ordination. So maybe it's best if I stay off the roads.

Anyway, that's it for today. I haven't included any links in this, so I guess that makes me a bad blogger.

Suck it.


Tuesday, 21 April 2009

#BEDA the Twenty-First:
The Beckoning of Happiness

Hey, you!

As you may have noticed, I'm trying (and failing) to start this in a new way every day. I'm rapidly running out of ideas. 

Well today was nice. I'm straining to enjoy my days more at the moment. Trying to slowly build myself up to the schedule I was at before my interview. I'm still getting up late, but I've got designated practise time, Tv time, and 'be nice to my parents mother' time. It's like rehab for the lazy. But tomorrow (or maybe the next day) I'm going to really hit the job-hunting hard. Somewhere there's a tiny charity shop where I can read all day with my name on it! :D

I think I'm going to miss #BEDA, when it's over. I really like how my friends now remind me to blog. I'll miss reviewing my day each evening, it's like a little de-briefing. It isn't, however, something I could really keep up. Maybe someday in the future I'll have enough readers to warrant posting everyday, but at the moment I think I'm just annoying a fair few people. I'll maybe go back to weekly posts, but I'll try and include a little something extra each week for those that do follow me.

I'm really loving the sun at the moment as well. I always complain about summer when I have to get dressed up to go out. I tend to look better with more clothes on, instead of less. But when I'm at home I can just mooch about the garden with a G&T, barefoot in my shorts, like a hobbit. It's lovely. We have a little patch of sand in the middle of our garden, where we put up this above-ground pool we have in the summer, and I love walking over it. It reminds me of the beach (two weeks!).  We also had our first meal outside tonight, and I annoyed the neighbours and their horses by playing Beirut songs on my ukulele to my parents.

I'm getting a new uke! Some of you probably know this, especially as one of you was with me when I tried it out. It's a Tanglewood, same make as my guitar. It's a concert soprano, a bigger version of the two smaller ones I have now, and it's beautiful! Only £79, and I've managed to persuade my Mom to pay £30/40 of it. That leaves me with some money to get all of John Green's books, and The Office. I've not properly treated myself like that in quite a while, so I don't feel too guilty. Plus I'm trying to make sure I do it at a time when I can afford it on top of everything else. 

Anyway, I'm off to have a nice shower, and get myself some nom, but I'll leave you with this lovely site that Valerie posted on Twitter. It's called StairPorn, and it's really, strangely, brilliant. There're so many beautiful staircases and some really cool ones too! Definitely worth checking out! 

Hope you're all well, my dears!



Monday, 20 April 2009

#BEDA the Twentieth: Is this Water?


Okay, so John Green's live right now, so forgive me if this is fragmented and pretentious. The odd combination of brilliant poetry and casual wit that his live shows provide means that getting any kind of continuity is near impossible.

So that reminds me of something I've been meaning to post about for a while. In a show not so long ago now, John mentioned and then read this speech, by the writer David Foster Wallace. I saved it, and I've read it a few times in the past week, and I've given it a lot of thought. I'm generally quite quick to anger, and quick to judge, and I am definitely guilty of thinking that everything is going wrong solely for me. So it's made a bit of an impact on me, in that sense.
But there's also something else going on, something that I can't quite put my finger on yet; Some sort of wave which will break in the close future. Whether it will wash up good or bad, I don't yet know.

Anyway, speaking of me being quick to anger, I've been getting pretty annoyed at Facebook recently. Not the site itself, although I am a quite notorious critic of it. No, this time my problem lies with the users. People who make groups about how 'David W. Hall should be have his account deleted for his disgusting pro-Gay Marriage group!', people who post inane updates about how they're going to the gym, been to the gym, and are now whipping up a protein shake (but what do I know, I'm on Twitter), and people who invite me seven times to their group about a car dealership.

I would delete it, and in fact I was going to, but I don't want to fall into the Alex Day trap. I hardly use it anyway, and I've now made Twitter my homepage instead, which makes me feel a bit better. I still hate it though, so if I'm 'on' Facebook chat and I don't reply, or if you comment me and I don't reply, don't take it personally. I just don't use Facebook for anything else but a combined photo album/email account.

Of course you could just say this is a poor excuse for my laziness, but that would be very heartless of you. Why would you claim that? Plus generally if the comment is something that really matters/needs to be chased up, I'll do it away from Facebook. Like on Skype, which you should all get.

Anyway. That's it for today. Although I am thinking of buying this book.
Sexy, isn't it? (Inside joke, much? :P)

Miss you!


Sunday, 19 April 2009

BEDA the Nineteenth: Oo-Er!

So Hi.

How are you? Have you missed me? I know, I know.. It's been a while. All of a day!

So yesterday I was lucky enough to have my second guest blogger, Casey, do my post. She did a great job, certainly better than what I was going to offer you! Her blog is here, if you fancy more. She's doing #BEDA too, so you can have your fill of awesomeness and lovely pictures.

So today I had my old music teacher over for lunch, which I'll admit I was dreading. He's lovely, and has helped me so much; I wouldn't be where I am today if it weren't for him. Still I didn't want him to see me bored, useless and unemployed like I am at the moment. But he was brilliant. I didn't feel like the disappointment that I thought I would, instead he made me feel like I still had all the potential I did when I sang the solo to Rutter's Requiem in Year 8.

He promised to put me in contact with some of his associates, to get me back into music, and already I've had an old brass teacher of mine demand that I get back to him as soon as I can.. So things might finally be looking up!

On the negative side of things however, I'm having problems with my beloved iPlayer. It won't stop halting, whatever I do, making it nearly impossible to watch any show. Couple this with the crippling nausea that's overtaken my body in the last half hour, and this evening isn't promising to be a good 'un.

Hope you're well!

All my love,


Saturday, 18 April 2009

BEDA the Eighteenth: CaptainCeej behind the Wheel!

Here comes the rain again
Falling from the stars
Drenched in my pain again
Becoming who we are

Got on the radio, my old blue jeans,
And I'm wearing my heart on my sleeve.
Feeling lucky today, got the sunshine,
Can you tell me what more do I need?
And tomorrow's a mystery, but that's okay.

Lot of people spend their time just floating
We were victims together but lonely
You got hungry eyes that just can't look forward
Can't give them enough but we just can't start over
Building with bent nails we're falling but holding,
I don't wanna take up any more of your time

Forever never seemed so close as when
you put your hands in my pockets and said,
"I'm quite fond of you kid. I think we'll be just fine.
You keep the sky & I'll settle for that look in your eyes"

Although loneliness has always been a friend of mine,
I'm leaving my life in your hands.
People say I'm crazy and that I am blind,
risking it all in a glance.
But how you've got me blind is a mystery.
I can't get you out of my head.
Don't care what is written in your history,
as long as you're here with me.

Bite my lip and close my eyes
Take me away to paradise


Friday, 17 April 2009

BEDA the Seventeenth: My bad!

Well, yes. Lets not talk about it too much, shall we? I almost failed #BEDA, and needless to say, I saw my blogging life flash before my eyes. So let's focus on the positive instead, shall we?

Wednesday saw my first guest blogger, Amy! I kind of threw her in the deep end, a bit, as she's never blogged before, and didn't really know anything about it until she started dating me! Despite this, she did really well, and got the highest number of positive ratings this blog has had so far! So a big success for Amy! *claps*

So in related news, part of my intention when I started #BEDA was to get more interaction with my readers and followers. Not the horrible corporate 'interaction' that people follow you on Twitter to provide, but real interaction. More comments, ratings, questions and ideas. So far, I'd say it's been pretty successful. I'm now getting at least two ratings every post, and my average number of comments have gone up. I've had some great ideas input and I even had one of my followers write it a post for me!

I still think I can get more, and I'd love to. Partly I'd like to try and make the 'guest blogger' thing a regular occurrence. That'll hopefully come in time, but really, anyone's welcome! Let me know in the comments, or email me.
The other thing I'd really like is your involvement with changing the layout. This layout's quite a typical one, and there's been a huge influx of blogs looking like these due to #BEDA, so I'm gonna be throwing some new layouts at you, as well as new sidebars and new describeys (^ Up there, BeardLovers ^).

Anyway, as most of you know now, YouTube's changing. I'll admit that my attitude to the changes has changed quite radically, and whilst I'm still apprehensive about what affect this will have on the communities we've built around user-generated content, I'm sure we'll pull through it. I've heard good reports from people for whom it's already changed, and I just hope that YouTube aren't going to do a Hulu, and forget about us over the pond.

In other news, the new Harry Potter trailer is out! Yes, I did dance a little.. It looks amazing. Some really great acting there from Tom Felton in the part of Draco. I'm still concerned about the soppy Harry/Ginny kiss as opposed to the fiery one in the books but meh. I'm just happy it's going to happen! Bring on June!

One last thing (yes I'm compensating for almost failing yesterday by writing a really long post today, deal with it!), the ever benevolent, omniscient and powerful John Green (@realjohngreen), has pledged to donate $1,000 to the fight against malaria, if we can convince the now-being-followed-by-a-million-people actor Aston Kutcher (@aplusk) to follow him on Twitter. Aston is obviously gonna have a lot of spammy @Replies, so we're going to have to use our numbers.

NerdFighters - To work!

Happy hunting!